What is emotional intelligence?

Emotional intelligence, or EQ, is the “ability to recognize and understand emotions in yourself and others, and your ability to use this awareness to manage your behavior and relationships,” write Dr. Travis Bradberry and Dr. Jean Greaves, authors of Emotional Intelligence 2.0. While IQ and personality are stable over a lifetime, the authors explain, “emotional intelligence, on the other hand, is a flexible set of skills that can be acquired and improved with practice.”

Adolescents who improve their emotional intelligence can better handle the challenges and emotions they face as they mature into adulthood. In addition to the Learned Optimism class taken by eighth graders at AHS, all students at AHS are taught to access the entire range of tools and resources at their disposal—the spiritual elements, physical, mental, emotional, and their relationships with family, friends and trusted adults.

Information and strategies to improve emotional intelligence

• Understand your child better by increasing your understanding of his or her personality and preferences. There are several tests to measure this, including Myers-Briggs, the Color Code (PDF explainer, Color Code test) and the 5 Love Languages.
• 3 mindfulness rituals, from an article by Eric Barker author of the book Barking Up the Wrong Tree
• 13 things science says will make you happier
• 31 benefits of gratitude
• Byron Katie’s four questions
• Setpoint of happiness
• The Book of Joy
•  What do 90-somethings regret most
• Jody Moore’s Lessons for Children
  • Lesson 1: Your Amazing Brain
  • Lesson 2: Don’t Fear Your Feelings
  • Lesson 3: What’s Your Focus
  • Lesson 4: How to Love Yourself
  • Lesson 5: Emotional Maturity
  • Lesson 6: How to Solve a Problem
• Circumstances are neutral
• Empathic listening and validation
• Arbinger’s The Choice in Intervention for Students
• Growth Mindset
• Be aware of what your belly and brain are consuming, and implement strategies to stop consuming things that hurt you. How does it make you feel in the moment? How do you feel later? Studies continue to show the relationship between food and emotional and mental well-being. Also, be aware of the media you consume and how it makes you feel. What effect does social media, a movie, video game, book or song have on your emotions?
• Use life coach Brook Castillo’s CTFAR Self-Coaching Model: Circumstances can trigger Thoughts, that cause Feelings, that cause Actions, that cause Results. Our thoughts can lead to a reality we create for ourselves—which may not necessarily be the truth. So observe your thoughts, analyze them and question them before you take them as the absolute truth.